


Who is Fake Engaged to Who Again?

by Akira_of_the_Twilight



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Human, Established Relationship, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Implied Bad Parenting, M/M, OT4, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-25
Updated: 2016-01-25
Packaged: 2018-05-16 06:54:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5818441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akira_of_the_Twilight/pseuds/Akira_of_the_Twilight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The problem with keeping your polyarmous relationship a secret from your family is that you have to remember who is dating who and who is fake engaged.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Who is Fake Engaged to Who Again?

“Okay, I’m a genius and even I can’t figure this out right now.” Tony picked up the index cards with his and his boyfriend’s names scrawled across them.

Clint stole the cards out from Tony’s hands and laid them back down on the kitchen table. “It’s easy. Last year Tony was my fiancé, and Steve was your boyfriend.”

“Wait,” Steve interrupted. “I’m think you’re right that I was with Tony, but was I really just a boyfriend?”

Tony shook his head. “Honestly, I can’t remember. I know we considered calling you my boyfriend because we didn’t want my dad to go into a huge rage fit—just a mild one, but I also remember wanting to go for broke and call you my husband.”

“I remember talking to you about that too.”

“Last I heard, you two went as boyfriends,” Bucky chipped in. He picked up an index card with Clint’s name on it and a second one with his. “Clint, I was your fiancé last year--not Tony. You dated Tony the year before.”

Tony scrunched up his face. “Why did we change that again?”

“My dad likes to hunt, and Bucky knows how to hunt.” Clint shrugged. “Since my dad is the hard parent to please, we decided Bucky should be my fiancé since he’d have something in common with my dad.”

“Yeah, but why were we so adamant that Steve should go with Tony last year? I still think it should have been me or Clint,” Bucky said.

“Because you just want to start shit with my dad,” Tony answered. “And Clint wouldn’t straight up call my dad a dick to his face—unlike you—but he knows how to be a wonderfully passive aggressive shit.”

“That is true,” Clint admitted. He slid two index cards with Bucky and Steve’s name toward Steve. “I think you told you’re mom that you and Bucky are still just dating.”

Steve huffed. “I want to tell her that all of you are my boyfriends. She’d be fine with it.”

Bucky shook his head. “Sarah would accept it eventually, but I don’t think the holidays are a good time to see how she reacts to polyamory. We should wait until your birthday. No one yells at their kid on their birthday.”

“That’s months from now,” Steve argued.

“Also, some parents yell at their kids on their birthday,” Tony grumbled and bowed his head.

Bucky slammed his hands on the table. “And see! This is why I want to be your fake fiancé! Please, Tony, just give me a chance to kick your dad’s ass! We’ll say you and Steve had a rough patch, and I’m your new boyfriend. Then next year you and Steve can pretend to have gotten back together.”

“Oh boy,” Clint rubbed his face. “This is getting more complicated.”

“I’m not going to let you kick my dad’s ass; he’ll sue you and have you arrested for assault and battery.”

“God damn it!” Bucky slouched in his chair.

Steve patted Bucky on the knee. “Don’t worry, I’m taking care of Howard, in my own special way.”

“What?” Tony asked.

“By the way,” Clint interjected, “Bucky’s mom left a message on the answering machine for Tony. She wants to know what kind of pie you’d like.”

“Anything but pecan,” Tony answered.

“Wait,” Bucky said. “I think I have the couples down, but who is pretending to be just boyfriends and who is pretending to be engaged?”

The room went silent as the four young men pondered the answer.

Tony picked up a bottle of beer and took a swig of it. “God damn it. Okay, this year we begin dropping hints about polyamory to our parents that way next year we can pretend to be triads and work them up to the idea of quartets.”

Clint, Bucky, and Steve all agreed.


End file.
